Heat do not regress against Grizzlies, instead pulverize Memphis into oblivion

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Sure, the Heat beat the Lakers on Thursday. But that was a desperation win for a team that was trying to stop the hemorrhage. Surely in their next game against Memphis, they would revert to the shaky, unreliable, fourth-quarter collapsing squad that has seemed so out of sync since the All-Star break, right?

If anyone caught the license number of that helicopter tank with jet engines, please let the Grizzlies know.

They say stats don’t tell you everything. And that’s very true. But see what these numbers tell you about the Heat versus the Grizzlies.

Dwyane Wade: 28 points on 9-15 shooting, 5 rebounds, 9 assists, 3 steals, 5 blocks. Two steals shy of a 5X5 that he probably would have gotten had he stayed in the game to finish it.

LeBron James: 27 points on 10-16 shooting, 5 rebounds, 5 assists, 1 steal, 2 blocks.

Chris Bosh: 18 points on 7-11 shooting.

Miami Big 3: 73 points

Grizzlies’ top five scorers: 63 points

eFG% (shooting factoring three-pointers weighted) Miami 66.7% Memphis 39.9%

It was an epic beatdown. The Grizzlies were without Rudy Gay, but unless Michael Jordan, fresh out of Bill and Ted’s phonebooth in 1993 was stepping onto the floor, it wouldn’t have mattered. The Grizzlies looked totally overmatched and you couldn’t really blame them considering how the Heat played. All the hype Miami was given in the preseason? It was in anticipation of days like this. Wade and James were locked into one another on the floor, Bosh was aggressive in the elbow post, and even Mike Bibby was dropping 3-pointers. It was a beatdown of epic proportions. The final doesn’t really reveal how lopsided this game was, and the final score was 118-85 for crying out loud.

Memphis is no great team, they’re not in Boston or Chicago’s league. But they’re a playoff team (at the moment), who have played pretty well this season and beat the Heat earlier this season (when the Heat were without Wade). Even without Rudy Gay, the Grizzlies have notched wins in the last week against Dallas and Oklahoma City. But against a motivated, locked in, and suddenly surging Heat team, they stood no chance. Maybe Miami will go back to their discombobulated ways of ISO’s and jump-passes. But if they don’t, ye Gods.

In closing, Jamal Magloire scored. That is all.