Pig Miller played pretty much his entire career with a toothpick in his mouth, but suddenly Caron Butler’s straw chewing is a safety issue so big that the NBA league office needs to weigh in. Sure it is.
Butler is not happy about the new banning of straws policy, and he told Jim Rome about it.
“I mean I am a little bitter about it. I have been doing it for eight years ever since I have been in the NBA but rules is rules and it is what it is so I am going to go back to my Mountain Dew.”
Rome then asked everyone’s first question: Why were you chewing straws in the first place? You know they invented gum, right?
“I mean I just always used to chew stuff because, one, it was traditional and another thing it just had me at ease out there. It was something that I did. A lot of people chew gum when they are playing basketball. I just always chewed my straws.”
No word yet on what his replacement chew toy will be.
The whole thing is silly — Butler has always chewed straws in the NBA. Why notice and crack down now? Clearly, the spies that David Stern has following Mark Cuban around looking for infractions were having a slow day and turned their eyes to Butler and his outlaw straws.
Hey, Stern: You may like the NFL’s economic model, but the fans don’t like the No Fun League part of it. Don’t be bringing that to the NBA.
What championship hangover? Cavaliers rout Knicks on ring night in Cleveland.
LeBron had a triple-double — 19 points, 14 assists, 11 rebounds — and led the Cavaliers to an easy win over the Knicks, 117-86. Kyrie Irving had 29 points — 19 in the third — and Kevin Love added 23 in the win.
But mostly it was the Cavaliers’ offense getting whatever shot it wanted and the Knicks watching dunks from up close.
Over the course of this season, these Knicks will evolve into something better than they showed opening night. No Derrick Rose (trial) and no Joakim Noah (injury) meant the Knicks starting five didn’t have a lot of cohesion and chemistry from the start.
After a sluggish first five minutes by both teams — they were a combined 6-of-22 shooting to open the game — the Cavaliers slowly started to create a little space behind 10 first quarter points from Love. That lead really started to grow as the Knicks bench came in and went 0-of-6 shooting to end the quarter, with Brandon Jennings making questionable decisions. Tack on seven Knick turnovers and the first and they were down 10 after 12 minutes.
The Cavs were in control through much of the second quarter until the Knicks went on a 10-0 run to make it a game again. It was Derrick Rose and Carmelo Anthony driving the team — they shot a combined 12-of-20 in the first half, the rest of the Knicks were 5-of-23. It was 48-45 Cavaliers at the break.
In the third quarter the Cavaliers starters cranked it up behind Kyrie Irving and tighter defense — the third quarter saw Kyrie Irving with 19 points and the entire Knicks team with 19. It was 82-64 Cavs after three and the celebration was on.
Kristaps Porzingis showed some moments but his 16 points came on 5-of-13 shooting. Anthony had 19 points on 18 shots. Rose had 17 points but four turnovers and one assist. Brandon Jennings came off the bench to shoot 1-of-7. It was not their best night.
For the Cavs, it was one to remember — the first banner in 52 years went up.
Did we mention LeBron James was dunking all over Knicks? Watch for yourself.
“At this point, if you’re not from here, live here, play here, dedicate yourself to Cleveland, then it makes no sense for you to live at this point — Cleveland against the world!”
And with that, the Q went nuts.
LeBron James and the Cavaliers got their rings and raised a banner in Cleveland — the first title banner in that city in 52 seasons (although the Indians are trying to have their say on the matter across the street). It was emotional for everyone in the building, and particularly the hometown boy LeBron.